Out of the mouth of babes.......and men

Here are some conversations that took place in our home in the last few days. Before you read this you need to know that 1. Kailyn doesn't understand sarcasm, and she is really trying to grasp it, and 2. John does find me attractive. Here goes

Kailyn "mom, your butt is big"
me "I know"
K "no really, it's big."
me "I am aware"
K "I just wanted you to know your butt is big"
me "I got it Kailyn, I have a big butt"
K "Is that sarcasm?"
me "no, it isn't. I am acknowledging the hugeness of my butt"
K "ok, because it really is huge."

This got me to wondering, how wide was my butt and how far is it spanning? I had asked John the loaded question and he responded quite well. He said something like I don't know, I like your butt. Tonight; however, was different. I was looking in the mirror and said...
"huh, I guess my butt is getting bigger. I've got a little junk in my trunk. How my junk is in my trunk?"
John "Ya, your butt is a little junky"
me "hahahahaha, I've gotta blog this"